Once I learn to tear open inter-dimensional portals at will...

IT'S ALL OVER FOR MY HATERS!

Happy National Create a Vacuum Day! Today's occasion invites us to explore spaces void of matter. I would like my adversaries to explore spaces void of matter by chucking them into an inter-dimensional portal or hurling them off into the far-flung reaches of the neighboring galactic spiral arm.

The space above should be occupied by photos of some new products. As you can see, it is not. I am starting to suspect our suppliers and vendors are merely pawns in an elaborate prank being played on us by the cosmos, since they seem to be in the business of sabotaging Boredwalk instead of just sending us all the cool things we are designing for you. Rest assured, we will pry these wares from the ether and entertain you with hilarious new things before the end of this month. (I hope.)

Me reviewing the work product we've been getting from our suppliers.

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Alright, onward from my grievances! Let's celebrate today's notable birthday persons, including:

• Civil rights activist Rosa Louise McCauley Parks, born on this day in 1913! Ms Parks is best known for her pivotal role in the 1955 Montgomery bus boycott that sparked the broader Civil Rights Movement of the 1950s and 1960s.

• Singer, songwriter and actor Vincent Damon Furnier, better known as Alice Cooper, born on this day in 1948! Cooper is known for elaborate showmanship involving props such as guillotines, electric chairs, fake blood, reptiles, baby dolls, and dueling swords. He is considered "The Godfather of Shock Rock."

• Comedian, actor, writer, and producer Hannibal Amir Buress, born on this day in 1983! You may have seen him on The Eric André Show or Comedy Central's Broad City.

It was also on this day in 1959 that Mattel co-founder Ruth Handler created the Barbie Doll. Thanks, I guess?

Lastly, it was on this day in 2004 that Mark Zuckerberg launched Facebook from his Harvard dormitory room.

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Alright! We'll be back in your inbox Monday with a new Boredwalk Community Q&A, more famous birthdays, a random holiday or two, and other assorted entertainment!

Until next time...

Peace, love, and interstellar vacuums,

Meredith